Book Review: “Buy Yourself the Damn Flowers” by Tam Kaur

I discovered Tam Kaur in 2023. It was a horrific year – I got out of a long-term relationship, was unemployed, became depressed and had the tiniest support system. In other words, I was at the lowest point of my life when I realized what actually was the biggest problem: I’d never really loved myself. I had no clue what self-love was. That was when I started exploring, learning about it, and trying various practices in an attempt to be kinder to myself.

At that point in life, Tam’s content was extremely helpful and comforting. She was sharing insights and advice on self-validation and personal growth, feminine energy, setting boundaries – you get it.

Three years later, I discovered she’s written a book -a self-love guide- titled, Buy Yourself the Damn Flowers. Even though I was at a different point in life, I wanted to read it. Besides, self-love is an ongoing journey with many ups and downs, and I won’t pretend that there are no struggles anymore.

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If you’re new to personal growth and self-love, you’re going to love this book and find it very useful. It’s clear, easy to read with many tools and techniques included. At the end of each chapter, there’s a summary and a list of practices as a homework for the reader. These lists can definitely come in handy if you’re interested in improving or working on self-love.

Also, Tam Kaur makes her book very relatable because she’s not holding back, and she’s not there to just give advice. She’s open about her personal experiences and talks about several traumatic experiences she’s gone through. That way, she uses her own life as an example of how personal development and self–love have helped her improve her life and self-concept.

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If you’re familiar with Kaur’s content or a long-term fan, you might not get as excited. It’s nothing new, and it feels like it’s compiled information from both her videos and podcast. So, if you prefer videos to books, you might feel like you’re not getting anything special from the book. I do prefer books to videos, and I love having the information gathered in one place – so, maybe it all comes down to personal preference after all.

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I personally enjoyed reading this book, and I’ll probably do most of the “homework” at some point. Even though it didn’t teach me something entirely new, I read it at a time I was struggling with anxiety and low confidence. So, it reminded me of everything I should do or change to get back on track.

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You can get the book here.